Halrloprillalar (prillalar) wrote,

Torture your darlings

Did you ever have a pairing that you liked a lot? And not only did you like them, but you couldn't bear to hurt them? So when you wrote about them, it was always happy and nice and free from all but the most minor conflict?

I've had three of them so far (call me on it if I've missed some). And with the latest pair, I want to try to break out of that pattern.

The first pair is Skinner/Pendrell in TXF. An improbable pairing, to be sure. They did actually meet up in canon at least once. (Not counting when Pendrell died.) But I got them together and wrote many short stories about various holidays and it was all dialogue and little life things. I think the most traumatic thing was that Pendrell's cat got lost. But when I was writing, Pendrell had already died in canon and so I figured that spectre hanging over them was enough.

The second is Merry/Pippin. And I don't apologize for writing silly pieces that turned on dialogue and affection. They're hobbits, they suffered enough in the books, they deserved to be happy. But sometimes I wish I'd written something a bit deeper, to do better by them.

I also noticed that for both these pairs, I hardly, if ever, wrote anything more explicit than a kiss for them. In general, the happier the relationship, the less likely I am to write The Sex. I'm not sure why. Possibly I don't want to know. *g*

I don't have a pairing like that in Star Wars, in XMM, in Harry Potter. Well, I suppose Hermione/George. But I haven't written copiously about them. And I think I could make them hurt if I needed to.

The third untouchable pair is Inui/Kaidoh in Prince of Tennis. It doesn't help that I'm deeply attached to each character separately. It doesn't help that I'm so gone on them that not only do I have a song for them (the ultra-sappy Phil Collins cover of Groovy Kind of Love), but I have a song for me and the pairing, if that makes any sense (Puffy AmiYumi's Your Love is a Drug).

I love them so much that I want them always to be happy. And that's nice if you're a real person. But it's not really that interesting to read about. And I sort of feel like I'm cheating them if I write something challenging about another pair and just give them kiss porn.

So I have to figure out how to break out of the mould. I don't want to just arbitrarily insert some tragedy (and remind me to post the Coal Mine Tragedy scenario kestrelsan made up for me some time) -- that would be gratuitous and pointless.

But I want something deeper for them. I have to somehow look beyond my own infatuation with them to find something in their relationship to explore. Besides kissing. Mmm, kissing. Aargh!

Does this ever happen to you?

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